Everyone's a Critic

Taking criticism is sometimes hard to swallow. Unfortunately it's one of the necessary evils of being, or trying to be a writer of any sort. It's something that every person, in every field must go through in order to get better at what they do. The good thing is, in most cases it does more help than harm. Let's be honest though, no one likes to hear it no matter how helpful it may be.

Last night I got my prose blasted by the last person I would have expected to. Now let me set this up for you so you get my drift as clear as possible. I got a call from a girl who I hadn't seen in a few months. I got the invitation I wanted, took a quick shower, and I was at the front door in 30. White wine, a small couch, candles, and a movie. Boo-yah, sounds like a good Thursday night, no?

After a bit of catching up, I did what I always do and shamelessly plugged my blog. In some dopey, subconscious way, I think my web page ideas coupled with some irrelevant Italian phrases can miraculously swoon any girl into a fit of culture-filled passion and desire. It almost never does. At my recommendation she read my favorite piece. She gave me a luke-warm reaction that was kind of complimentary, smiled, and went back to her wine.

Fast forward an hour or so. The wine's gone, we're getting cuddly, and the movie is pretty much meaningless at this point. "Are you happy to see me?" I asked. "Yeah," she said, "but next time you come to me with some writing, you better bring more to the table". She had just admitted she didn't like my piece. She then told me my writing was good but unfocused. More than that, she went on to tell me that if she didn't know me she wouldn't have made it past the second paragraph. For a writer, this is the equivalent of being punched in the balls right before you pee. It hurts, and then pain kind of lingers around for a few minutes.

Your first instinct is always to defend yourself, but with no ulterior motive in her description, I had to accept it as a valid point. In fact, it was criticism in its purest form. Albeit alcohol induced, she was blatantly honest. I was staying over no matter what she said about my writing. Honestly, reading back on a few of those blogs, she wasn't entirely wrong. It was refreshing. I realized that I'd rather be bashed honestly than complimented dishonestly or out of obligation.

Let this be a challenge to you, the reader, or readers (hopefully) to step up to the plate and start criticising what you read more openly, even brutally if you have to. Honesty is more sincere than a flimsy compliment. Especially when you're pointing out something that the person your being honest with may or may not know. Don't go around telling fat people they're fat, or short people they're short. They know that already. Try being insightful, detailed, and offer a solution to whatever quip you have with the writer. It's seriously refreshing.

I'd be a fool not to see the whole thing as a win/win situation. I still spent the night, kept my ego intact, got some free breakfast, and some pointers how to make a better blog. Like I said before, sounds like a good Thursday night, no?